Talking About Choices and Consequences…

In Sunday school the week we were talking about how to train our children to make sensible choices and accept the consequences.

We were voicing some of the seemingly illogical decisions they were making, even as independent adults.

We were blaming the culture they were living in,

peers who influenced them,

ideals that went against the grain,

and their sense of entitlement.

Our priest had touched on a few questions to ask of our children when they were faced with a choice,

Is it legal?

Would it be pleasing to God?

How does it fit in with our culture?

How does it affect others?

“And what will the neighbors say?” I chimed in.

After the smiles and nods of, ‘I get that too,’ I related a choice I had made as a young adult newly in charge of her own fortune,

“I was leaving London to come to America and my parents asked me ‘What will we tell the neighbours?  How will we explain your absence?’  I told them they could offer any explanation they liked or simply tell them I’d gone to America for a while.”

“Was your decision based on emotion or need?” someone in the room asked.

“A little bit of both,” I replied.

“That sounds pretty adventurous, to leave your country and your culture, for the unknown.” she said.

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Magic & Shadow testing their boundaries

Which brought some other decisions both Hubs and I have made during our marriage, to the forefront of my mind:

The Decision to quit my corporate job and homeschool carrying with it the obvious consequence of:

forfeiting a rock solid, second income.

Sprinkled with less obvious effects such as:

showing our children they were more important than a job,

modeling the many ways to live a rich and fulfilling life and,

making sacrifices in order to follow our hearts and be true to self.

The Decision Hubs made to come home off the road and work for himself resulting in:

an end to irregular but extremely lucrative music tours as our main income.

Liberally peppered with more nuanced outcomes such as:

being together 24/7,

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Living in each other’s water bowl

instilling family values,

raising up moral citizens and,

throwing caution to the wind to feed our spirits and fire our imaginations.

After class I realized my children really weren’t making illogical decisions about their lives after all,

The choices we had made during their upbringing are pretty much reflected in who they are today.

They are making decisions based on their perception of how we managed our lives during their childhood.

Choices we made laced with adventure, calculation, uncertainty, confidence, courage, failure & contentedness,

Choices2

Building self-esteem one tumble at a time

clad in the warm gloves of love and security,

balanced with prayer, work and play,

resulted in a life overflowing with a desire to follow our hearts, please God, care for others, make it work and stay legal,

most of which, I realize now,

has been counter cultural.

Choices

Confident barn cats in the making

How could I expect my offspring to be any different?

Why would I want them to be?

 

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