Parents of young adults have to be so careful with their opinions.
Words are offered thoughtfully, we don’t want to appear pushy, we definitely don’t want to start a fight and heaven forbid we don’t want to intrude on their semi-independent lives.
Biting our tongues brings essential pain that pays off in the end, blood not- withstanding.
Learning how to swallow our words and hold our peace is a discipline of its own.
For, believe it or not, we have been there done that in most, if not all, the situations our offspring find themselves in at one time or another.
But, even the best of us who have had years of practice with the siblings who have gone before, stumble over our well chosen pearls of wisdom. They are tossed aside, largely unheard and abandoned in corners of the subconscious until ignited by a chance comment made by a peer and brought back to us thus,
“My friend, Siobhan, advised me to…”
Or worse,
“My friend Siobhan’s Mum said….”
I am reminded of dust shaken from a cloth, floating upwards to land somewhere else waiting to be whisked away another day.
Here’s some dust gathered afresh that I encountered this week!
We’ve been back from England almost two months and for my daughter this means little or no physical exercise, which soon mounts up especially when she’s used to dancing, singing, acting, all day, every day!
To her credit Daughts auditioned for a company and was accepted straight away, she rehearses once a week for a couple of hours.
She also joined a weekly musical theatre class at Collin College which keeps her singing for a couple of hours.
So far so good but still only four hours a week!
Then Tomorrow, not a peer, or a peer’s Mum for that matter, but a mature student who is a friend of Daughts, said,
“You need to keep dancing, you can’t just stop, you’ve worked too hard to risk getting out of shape.”
The flame is ignited beneath the tossed out words I may have spoken aloud in a moment of abandon. They break their huddle and tumble fresh from her lips landing at my feet, authorative and true.
“I’ve been invited to take company classes at college whenever I can. I can’t afford to lose all I gained during my year in England, Mum.”
Thank you Lord for using Tomorrow as a vessel for an heard message to ring, loud and clear, from her lips.
Our children don’t fall far from the tree and when, like a cat bringing a trophy home after a night’s hunting, they drop your pearls of wisdom at your feet, your heart will swell and your bitten tongue will utter words of thanks,
“Come here and give me a hug!”
Well hello there! My name is Vivienne McNeny.
I am an empty nester exploring life as a Boomer…you could say I'm happily Boomering along!
As a homeschooling Mum I have finally quit the job of role model and mentor to my four children. I do what I want to do, eat when I feel like it, enjoy life with my blue eyed cowboy and clean my house once a month or so whether it needs it or not!
In true English form I write about the emergence of my true identity now that I can no longer hide behind my children as their Mum.
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